Georgia Family Law Blog

Clients Can Help - 14 Tips for the Client Going Through a Divorce

Like most litigants, the end result and the cost of legal representation are among the most important concerns of anyone involved in a family law dispute. With these concerns in mind, clients frequently ask me if there is anything they can or should be doing to reduce the time I need to spend on their case or to help move things forward. The answer is a resounding “Yes!”  Here are 14 tips on how to be a good family law client and, at the same time, help your attorney achieve the best possible result without incurring excessive cost:

1. In advance of the first meeting with your attorney, assemble as much relevant documentation as possible. For instance, in a typical divorce case, this would include (at a minimum) complete copies of recent tax returns, pay stubs for both you and your spouse, a detailed list of all assets and liabilities, and any legal paperwork already filed and/or served upon you.
2. Speaking of documentation, organize every piece of paper that you give to your attorney. Documents should be stapled, labeled and assembled in an orderly fashion. Keep in mind that your attorney and his/her staff will do whatever is necessary to organize the documentation that you provide to him/her if you don't do so. It will, however, take time and cost money.
3. Keep a detailed diary of all significant events pertaining to your case and make sure to share copies with your attorney. A "Week-at-a-Glance" calendar often serves this purpose well. This may be especially important in a custody case. Your memory may fade with time, but a well-kept diary can be used to refresh your recollection prior to and/or during a hearing. Additionally, your attorney can use your diary to assist in preparing your testimony in advance of a hearing.
4. A picture is worth a thousand words. Besides documenting things in your diary, document what you can with photographs and/or videos. For instance, if you decide to move out of the marital residence, take photographs of the condition of the residence and all property that you left behind.
5. Ask questions. There is no such thing as a stupid question. More often than not, questions from clients are highly relevant and serve as a basis for helping to frame out the issues and develop strategies.
6. If you need to discuss non-legal issues with someone, you may not want to call your attorney. His/her hourly rate is probably much higher than a therapist's, and the therapist probably is better equipped to handle the issue. While your attorney may be a very good listener, it will be to your economic and emotional advantage to discuss non-legal issues with your therapist, family members, friends, priest, rabbi, pastor, etc.
7. Do your best to pay your attorney’s bills on a timely basis. If you cannot pay a bill within a reasonable amount of time, call your attorney and ask to work out some payment arrangements. If you are making a genuine effort, most attorneys will be understanding and work with you.
8. Promptly respond to calls and inquiries from your attorney. If it was not important, your attorney would not be contacting you. Furthermore, if you are not being responsive to your attorney, he/she will have no choice but to spend his/her time and your money trying to get a response.
9. When you leave a message for your attorney (either on voicemail or through a secretary) leave your phone number and the time when you will be available to speak. While your attorney likely has your number, it will take less time for your attorney to call you back if he/she does not have to find your number. This is especially true if your attorney is not in his/her office.
10. If you have left messages for your attorney and have not received a response in a reasonable period of time, realize that there is probably a good reason why he/she has not returned your call (i.e., tied up in court or meetings, or handling an emergency situation). If the reason for your call is of an urgent nature, do not hesitate to explain the situation to your attorney’s secretary and/or ask if you can speak with another attorney in the firm. If your call is not urgent, ask your attorney’s secretary when she expects the attorney to be available so that you can call again or ask if an appointment can be placed in the attorney’s calendar for a phone conference.
11. Do not believe everything that you hear from your spouse, family and friends as it pertains to your case and the law. Even though your spouse may act like he/she is trying to be accommodating, the reality is that he/she is likely out to get the best possible result for himself/herself. Similarly, realize that every case is different. Just because your friend’s cousin got a particular result does not mean that you will get a similar result.
12. Do not sign or agree to anything without first speaking with your attorney. Attorneys are usually in favor of parties speaking and trying to reach amicable resolutions between themselves. An attorney, however, can and will help you determine if the terms discussed are in your best interest. There is nothing wrong with telling the opposing party that you need some time to think about it and will get back to them after speaking with your attorney. If the opposing party is pushing you to sign something on the spot, be suspect.
13. Be discreet and resist the urge to deliberately annoy or antagonize your spouse. If you do or say something that you know will annoy your spouse, be prepared for appropriate retaliation. Also be prepared to pay your attorney who will, no doubt, get a call from the opposing counsel when your spouse calls to complain about your behavior.
14. Last, but not least, be candid and truthful with your attorney. Attorneys do not like surprises. If your Attorney is well-informed, he/she can be fully prepared to deal with potentially damaging information if and when it is raised by the other side.

SOURCE FOR POST: Pennsylvania Family Law Blog

Client Bill of Rights

Every client deserves these five guarantees from their lawyer:

1. The Right to Have All Phone Calls Returned Promptly. It still amazes me when people tell me their lawyer will not call them back at all.  One sweet lady recently told me her lawyer had not called her back IN SIX MONTHS worth of trying. This is no way to run a business. Heck, this is no way to treat a human being! If your lawyer does not call you back after repeated attempts, send them a (nice & brief) letter and keep a copy.  Still nothing?  Get a new lawyer ASAP.

2. The Right to Be Fully Informed. Clients should received a copy of all correspondence received and sent in their case. They should also be given a copy of all legal pleadings filed by either side.  If your lawyer talks about your case on a phone call to the other lawyer, you should be called promptly and told what was discussed.

3. The Right to Call the Shots. There are limits (do not expect me to do anything unethical just because my client want me to, for example) but for the most part it is the client who should decide if a settlement offer is fair and whether to file suit. I provide input, like best and worst case possibilities. I Help weigh options. Develop legal strategy. I even give my opinion in blunt terms sometimes. But my client makes ultimate decisions about his or her case.

4. The File Belongs to the Client. I had someone come to see me recently who had requested her file from her lawyer and she could not get it. Other people have told me they got their file but they were charged a mint for making the copies. WRONG! The case file belongs to the client.  If I am asked for it because someone wants to go hire another lawyer, I turn it over ASAP and if I want to make a copy for my records, that is my expense and bother. Not the client’s.

5. The Right to Know What It Costs. I have a written fee agreement. It explains what I charge per hour, that I charge in 6 minute increments and how much you must pay as a deposit up front to hire me. The deposit is different, depending upon the case. The other elements of the agreement, however, are consistent. I also tell people what other expenses may be necessary, what happens of they do not pay their bills from my office, etc. Every month, I send out detailed bills showing what I did and what was charged for it. Lawyers do not have to do all of these things . . . but they are required to charge a reasonable fee.

Source: VA Family Law Blog.

SOURCE FOR POST: Divorce Help Network

Nice article about a colleague

A colleague of mine, Kurt Kegel, of Davis Matthews and Quigley, a fellow divorce and family law attorney in Atlanta, was the subject of a recent article in the Atlanta Journal Constitution focusing on people who help other people through difficult times in their lives. It is no secret to those of us practicing in family law that our profession is full of good, professional and ethical attorneys, but it is refreshing to see one of our own acknowledged for those good deeds. Congratulations Kurt! The portion of the article about him is reprinted below, but please read the entire article about some other fine people in our community, a hospice nurse and funeral director:

Lights in the darkness

By Laura Raines
For ajcjobs
Published on: 03/14/08

Job description: Must be prepared at a moment's notice to deal with other people's distress, sadness, fear, pain and death. Skills needed: considerable. Hours: too many to mention. Rewards: priceless.

Would you answer the ad?

We know that life isn't all sweetness and light, but, given a choice, most of us probably wouldn't choose jobs in which we consistently meet people at the worst times of their lives.

Fortunately, hospice workers, domestic relations attorneys and funeral directors, to name a few, are willing to do that every day. Why? They feel called to help — and know that they can.

KURT A. KEGEL, family law attorney

As a sophomore in college, Kurt A. Kegel knew he wanted to be a lawyer. An internship with the Gwinnett County district attorney's office taught him what kind.

"I knew I always wanted to be involved with people and help them in difficult situations," he said. "I saw the benefits of being able to give something back."

As a family law practitioner with Davis, Matthews & Quigley, Kegel handles matters such as divorce, child custody and visitation, child support, family violence and other domestic-relations issues.

"A lot of my clients are in distress and under great emotional strain," Kegel said. "I can empathize, because I've gone through a divorce, and I tell them that there will be an end to the process and that they aren't alone."

He may recommend a counselor or therapist for emotional issues, but he can allay fears and answer questions about the legal process.

Over the years, he's developed an expert knowledge of the body of family law, but each case is different.

"You think you've seen it all, and then the next case comes through the door," he said.

A divorce or custody case is a highly charged, personal process, and Kegel knows he will hear the worst, nitty-gritty details of relationships.

"Some cases are harder than others, especially the ones when you suspect something inappropriate happened with a child or you see someone using a child as a pawn," he said. "Some days I walk out of here thanking God that I'm going home to my wife and children and can leave work at the office. It makes you appreciate what you have."

The client/lawyer relationship is a delicate balance. Kegel knows that a client has to be comfortable with his or her lawyer and be able to trust the lawyer's advice. A lawyer has to care about the people he or she serves.

"But a lawyer has to maintain a level of objectivity," Kegel said. "You can't afford to get so emotionally involved that you take on the case as a cause. If you lose your objectivity, you're doing your clients a disservice and not giving them the best help."

Kegel has served as past chairman of the State Bar of Family Law Section of the State Bar of Georgia and is a fellow in the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. He keeps improving his skills, because he wants to stay in family practice.

"There is a great sense of satisfaction in helping people through a very difficult time in their lives," he said.

SOURCE: AJC.com

Top 10 list: Top 10 questions to ask a divorce lawyer in the first consultation

If you are contemplating divorce, you should consult with an experienced family law attorney. Once you set up a consultation, be prepared for the first meeting, and have a list of questions to ask the lawyer. The following questions should help you understand the divorce process, how your lawyer’s office operates, and if the lawyer is a good fit for you and your case.

1. How experienced are you in family law? All lawyers have law degrees, but many lawyers practice in several fields other than family law. You don’t want a generalist. Family law is a specialized field, and you will likely be better served by a lawyer who focuses on family law. Make sure that most of their cases are family law cases. Ask the lawyer if they have handled cases like yours before.
2. What steps are involved in the divorce process? Your lawyer is there to educate you and guide you through the process. Have the lawyer clearly explain the process to you, from filing the petition, negotiating temporary orders, and the trial process.
3. How will you charge me? If you hire the lawyer, you should expect to sign a retainer agreement that covers how you will be charged. Ask about the hourly rate, and how often you will be billed. Ask if you will be charged for time spent with paralegals and other staff in the office, and at what rate. Ask what will happen if you cannot pay your bill in full every month. Ask if you can pay by credit card, and if payment plans are available.
4. How will we communicate? Ask your lawyer if they prefer phone contact over email, and how long you should expect to wait for a return call. Is your lawyer tech savvy enough to email you draft documents as PDF files? Is your lawyer’s office set up to scan and email incoming and outgoing correspondence? Do you automatically get a copy? The last three are essential if you live out of state, or a distance from your lawyer’s office. 
5. How long will the process take? Ask your lawyer about what is their estimate for how long the case will take depending on if you settle quickly, settle after protracted negotiations, or have a trial.
6. Can you estimate the cost of my divorce? This is an important question, but a very difficult one to answer. Don’t worry if your lawyer is hesitant to answer. The cost of a divorce depends on what you ask the lawyer to do, the level of conflict between you and your spouse, and the reasonableness of your spouse and their lawyer. Many of the cost factors are outside your control.
7. What kind of resources do you make available to clients to make the divorce process less difficult and painful? Divorce is a difficult time, and good lawyers provide information and resources to help deal with the human side of the impact. Does your lawyer provide information about the process for self education? Are they patient with you? Do they offer referrals to other professional services if you request them? 
8. Do you recommend mediation? Ask your lawyer if your case is appropriate for mediation. Ask about private mediation, and about how often the lawyer uses private mediation with clients. Good lawyers try to settle their cases once they have analyzed the case. A lawyer that does not use private mediation or other alternative dispute resolution tools may be doing you a disservice.
9. What fees and costs can I expect other than charges for your time? Your local county . . . will charge a filing fee to open a case. You will likely have to pay a process server to server your spouse with divorce papers. Your case may require experts, such as appraisers, actuaries, accountants, social workers, or psychologists. Ask your lawyer what costs to expect, what experts may be needed, and how you will be charged for these additional services.
10. How would you predict a judge would rule on the issues in my case? While no lawyer can guarantee specific results, listen closely to the analysis behind the lawyer’s answer. Understanding the facts that would make a favorable ruling more likely will help with strategy during the case.

SOURCE FOR POST: The Oregon Divorce Blog

How Clients Can Help Their Family Law Cases

Ben Stevens at the South Carolina Family Law Blog has published many good articles about the Attorney-Client relationship and his latest is superb. Thanks also to Jeanne Hannah for the original post from which Ben's was derived.

New clients often ask their lawyer how they can help ensure a good result in their divorce and/or custody cases.  The following tips from Jeanne M. Hannah can help clients obtain good results and often save money in their cases:

• Be prepared. Clients can gather documents and information about important financial issues, which will help save your lawyer time, which will typically save you money.
• Be flexible and prepared to accept change.  Understand that financial resources can become stretched during a divorce, and the ability to compromise can be invaluable in helping reach a successful resolution in your case.
• Be truthful with your attorney. Your lawyer's ability to help you is only as good as the information that you provide to him.  If you fail to provide accurate and truthful information, you are only hurting yourself.
• Prepare to use specialists.  You will generally obtain better results if you use a lawyer who doesn’t dabble in family law. Sometimes, other specialists may be needed to help with various issues in your case, such as counselors, financial planners, business valuation experts, CPAs, and/or child specialists.
• Ask your lawyer for recommendations to a specialist.  Your attorney can typically refer you to well qualified experts when the need arises.
• Make a list of the goals, needs and interests that are important to you, ranking them in order of importance. Once you draft your list, verify that they are realistic, and then focus on them and don't get distracted.
• Be empathic to your spouse’s position. By keeping all avenues of negotiation open, you can determine the other person's goals and thus what motivates him/her to settle. 
• Reduce conflict.  The more you can work to reduce conflict and work toward a solution, the more you can reduce your cost in any case.  Also, you should remember that conflicts consume not only money, but also energy.
• Remember, this isn't the end of the world.  At the end of the day, you want to be able to walk away, to take a break, and to start over while holding your head high, knowing that you  handled things in the right way.

You can read much more about each of these tips by visiting Ms. Hannah's blog.

Source:  "Preparing for Divorce" by Jeanne M. Hannah, published at her Updates in Michigan Family Law.

SOURCE FOR POST: South Carolina Family Law Blog

How to Save on Legal Fees for Your Divorce

You might think that a lawyer would be opposed to telling you how to spend less money on his fees, but not so. Most of the suggestions made below, by another lawyer no less, are things with which I whole-heartedly agree. A lot of the time a lawyer spends on the stuff he’s telling you to do yourself or avoid all together are the kind of work a sophisticated lawyer would rather not do anyways.

The truth of the matter is that our firm is comprised of specialists. While we can do the routine work, a better use of our skills is on those complex matters. For the rates you are paying for our services, you should expect that we’re going to work the really difficult stuff. The other stuff is just a matter of your pain threshold for the monthly bill. I suggest that you manage your legal budget for divorce accordingly.

Here is the entire article by John Harding [who is also the editor of the California Divorce Blog]:

Divorce is wrought with cost. The emotional cost of a failed relationship. The cost to children living in a two home family. The cost of maintaining two households. Then, of course, there is the cost of a lawyer. At hundreds of dollars per hour, legal fees in a divorce can easily be in the tens of thousands of dollars. The fact of the matter is that competent legal representation is expensive. That does not mean that you can’t help yourself to save money on attorney’s fees and costs associated with divorce. Here are ten tips that can help.

1. Always remember that time is money.

First you must understand how lawyers bill. Most of us are comfortable with the idea of a fixed fee. We see an item on the menu, with a price right next to it. Fixed, and straight forward. Legal billing is different. As Abraham Lincoln explained it, “a lawyer’s time and advice are his stock in trade.” In other words, lawyers bill for their time. The more time the lawyer invests in your case, the higher the legal fees will be. With this basic understanding you will be better able to comprehend and manage legal fees.

2. Understand when your lawyer is on the clock.

Time is the commodity. If you are unclear, don’t be afraid to ask your lawyer what he does charge for, and what he does not charge for. People don’t always know that time on the telephone can be charged. Sometimes lawyers charge for any time spent dealing with the case — including you taking your lawyer out to lunch. Get clarification so that you don’t unknowingly request services that you will be billed for. Also be prudent in your purchase of legal services. The more of your lawyer’s time that you use, the more you are going to pay. Appreciate that your lawyer needs to be kept apprised of significant events in your life. However, you do not have to swamp him with minutiae. Making sure your lawyer has knowledge of every hour in your days is not necessary.

3. Use your time with your lawyer wisely.

Most lawyers bill in incremental time. The concept is not unique. Most service professionals (doctors, dentists, accountants) base their efforts, and prices, on measured units of time. In the case of lawyers those units are typically blocks of minutes. For instance, many lawyers will be in six minute increments. As soon as the work starts, you are charged every six minutes. As an example, at $200 per hour, one six minute increment has a value/cost to you of $20. If you have a two minute conversation with your lawyer, that is one six minute increment, or $20 in fees. If you have a seven minute conversation, that is two six minute increments, or $40 in fees. To realize maximum efficiency under this system plan ahead before meeting with or talking to your lawyer. Save your questions for one conversation, rather than calling up your lawyer every time you have something on your mind. Four two minute conversations equals $80 in legal fees. One eight minute conversation equals $40 in legal fees.

How to Hire the Right Divorce Attorney

Too many people don't know what to look for when they are considering which divorce lawyer to hire.  Most people who are interviewing family law attorneys are in a very stressful situation, typically one that they have not been in before.  Making an important decision during a particularly stressful time can be a recipe for disaster.

DivorceZone published an article that can be helpful to people facing this situation.  This article points out that not all lawyers are created equal, and I would add that not every lawyer is "right" for every case.  It is more important in family law cases than other cases that the attorney and the client have a good, working relationship and understand each other.  This article lists the following important points to consider when hiring a divorce lawyer:

What Makes The Perfect Client?

What a lawyer thinks of as a “perfect client” in the domestic relations sense is a client who helps the process of the dissolution, custody, or support matter along. We know how hard this process is to be going through, but it can be a much more difficult process the longer it drags on — and a much more expensive one for you. (Although we like getting paid as much as anyone else, we believe we should be problem-solvers, not problem-creators.)

Good attorneys will always treat their clients — all of their clients — with the same professionalism and respect they treat any other client. However, by helping us help you, you can make the process smoother, lower your costs, and get a better result! Here are some things you can do to help your attorney in your domestic relations case, to make things run more smoothly.

• Tell us everything — the good, the bad, the ugly. We want to know the nastiest things the other side might throw at us, true or not. If you have hidden sources of income, a stake in Anna Nicole Smith’s love nest in the Bahamas, or a rare coin collection, we need to know and plan accordingly.
• Provide us with your tax, banking, investment, insurance, titles to cars and whatnot, and any other requested information quickly in the process (if you can bring this stuff to your first meeting, we might very well cry with joy). If you’re not in a place where you can get the information, sign a release that allows the attorney to request the information on your behalf.
• Keep in contact with us. We’ll provide you with frequent updates, but there are times when we need to get in contact with you quickly, too.
• Similarly, let us know the best way to contact you. If you’re one of those people who hates checking her voicemail but lives on her computer (wait, that would be me when I’m at home), let us know your email address and if that’s a better way to stay in touch.
• Understand that a contested divorce may take a while, even if it ultimately settles. We want closure for you as soon as we can get it, too, but not at the expense of a good settlement for you.
• If your case involves child custody, parenting time, or support, sign up and follow through with the mandatory education classes as soon as you can.
• Remember that your attorney is there to give you expert advice and recommendations, but isn’t going to be able to make the final decision about whether or not you should take a settlement. He can and will tell you if it’s a good idea or a bad idea, and what the benefits and pitfalls of an offer might entail, but the ultimate decision is going to be yours.
• Also, if you don’t like the way negotiations may be headed, if you change your mind about the way the case is going, or if you’re just generally unhappy about something, please say so. We’d much rather know about it (and fix it) than to find out much, much later that you’d been unhappy for a very long time.

Advice aside, we know that this may be the, or one of the most difficult times of your life. We treat all of our clients as we would hope to be treated under the same circumstances: with diligence to their case, courtesy, the utmost respect, and the highest level of customer service possible.

Source:  "The Perfect Client" by C. Sean Stephens, published at The Oregon Divorce Blog.

SOURCE FOR POST: South Carolina Family Law Blog

Good Divorce Lawyers Tell You Bad News

The following advice and observations are from the Honorable Anne Kass, a District Judge in the Second Judicial District State of New Mexico.

I have heard people who are thinking about getting a divorce say, "I want the meanest, toughest attorney I can find. I want a fighter." I always shudder and say that a fighter is the last thing anyone should want in a lawyer.

Fighter-attorneys may make a client feel good as they harass and humiliate the other spouse, but fighter-attorneys cost tons of money and they always make things worse--for both parties.

So, what are the characteristics of a good lawyer in divorce cases?

First, the hallmark of a good lawyer is that he or she will tell a client things the client does not want to hear. A good lawyer gives clients bad news.

In divorce cases there is always a good deal of bad news to be given.

--There will not be enough money to maintain the standard of living the family is used to.

--Often the family residence will have to be sold.

--Each parent will spend less time with the children because there will be a second home in which the children will spend time.

--The children may begin to misbehave or do poorly in school or exhibit other unfortunate problems, which will consume more time, energy and possibly money to pay counselors to try to solve.

The list of bad news goes on and on. The fighter-attorney fails to warn the client--allows, or even encourages, the client to hold on to unrealistic expectations. The good lawyer does not.

Clients sometimes say to a lawyer who tells them what they do not want to hear, "Whose side are you on anyway?" But a good lawyer is on the client's side when they explain reality.

Another sign of good lawyers is that they get along with one another. They are courteous to one another, and they are able to trust one another. They exchange information promptly. They cooperate. Fighter-attorneys do all sorts of stuff to aggravate the other side, which may provide a perverse kind of pleasure while it is happening, but in the end, non-cooperation between lawyers generates enormous legal fees and it increases the bitter feelings between the parties which ultimately damages their lives and the lives of their children. People who hire fighter-attorneys can expect a scorched-earth result. They are often surprised to discover they themselves have to live on that scorched earth.

Divorcing couples are wise to hire lawyers who are peace-makers and problem-solvers. Look for a lawyer who has gone to the trouble of getting mediation training, and watch out for attorneys who do not tell you things you do not want to hear.

SOURCE: AllLaw.com

Seven Factors to Consider When Choosing a Family Court Attorney

Very rarely do people consult a Family Court attorney under good circumstances. Your spouse has cheated on you. Your ex-spouse won't let you see your children. Things are not the way they should be. When experiencing such a crisis, it can be difficult for people to choose the right attorney to assist them. Complicating things even more is that Family Court cases are often a person's first experience with attorneys and the legal process.

The more you can educate yourself on where to turn, who to trust, and what to do, the better off you will be. There are many ways to look for an attorney. You can open the yellow pages, research on the internet, or ask your friends. However, many people do not feel comfortable asking their friends and family to refer them to an attorney due to the types of issues that are often involved in Family Court cases. For instance, you may not want your best friend to know that your spouse has cheated on you.

If you are researching attorneys via the yellow pages, internet, blogs, or other media, there are certain things that you should know to help you choose who to use. This article is written to assist people in that situation. Why should you trust your children, your finances, or other such important issues to the person that has the biggest or flashiest ad? I believe that you should have as much information as possible to aid you in deciding which attorney you let represent you. Consider the following seven factors when choosing your attorney:

Family Law: Meeting with a Lawyer

Treat your first meeting as a business consultation. Dress well and be prompt. Be polite and courteous. You will want to impress the lawyer, just as he or she will be trying to impress you.

When you enter the lawyer's office, look for technology. If you see a computer on the lawyer's desk (and if it's turned on), it indicates the lawyer is using technology, which should enable the lawyer to spend less time (and less of your money) to produce the documents needed for your case.

Give a lawyer the chance to get to know you. Don't feel compelled right off the bat to blurt out everything you want to tell the lawyer about your legal issues or needs. Many times, a lawyer will want to get some background information and even shoot the breeze a bit. This opportunity will provide both you and the lawyer with the chance to evaluate each other on an informal basis

Let the lawyer do the talking initially. You'll have all sorts of information that you'll want to relate, but the lawyer will be better able to hone in on the background facts that he or she feels are relevant or important. The more prepared you are with completed questionnaires, documents, diagrams and your own questions, the easier this process will be, and the more you will impress the lawyer.

During your initial consultation, you'll want to be able to share all relevant information with the lawyer. Even if you don't end up hiring the lawyer, everything you tell him or her during your meeting is subject to the attorney-client privilege, so honesty is in your best interest. Let the lawyer decide what is or is not in your favor. It's much better for the lawyer to know the bad things up front, rather than be surprised later.

If the lawyer is interested in representing you, you can expect that he or she will go through an educational process with you. You should take the time to make a honest assessment of your opposition and, if asked, to be able to relate the thoughts you have to the lawyer. Forget the huffing and puffing. Give your lawyer the straight scoop.

The lawyer may give you alternatives as to what you can do, and you should discuss the possible consequences of each option. Look for practical legal advice that in your own mind translates into good business sense.

Depending up on how well prepared you are, the lawyer may even be able to give you advice on how to proceed. This could be especially important when time is of the essence. For example, if your business has been sued and you need to file a response to the lawsuit immediately, you'll want a lawyer to get on the matter right away. By the end of your meeting, you should leave with a clear understanding of what you've accomplished.

If the lawyer is willing to take your case, you should be told what he or she charges for services. You may be presented with a contract that is called a retainer agreement or a legal services agreement. The lawyer should explain it to you. Read and understand the document before you think about signing it. At that time, or before services are rendered, you may also be asked to provide a retainer or deposit up front.

Be clear on what is to happen next, and then be sure to follow through on whatever you have been asked to do by your new attorney. The attorney will insist on cooperation from your end. If it's not clearly spelled out in a retainer agreement, also be sure to ask the lawyer how he or she would prefer to communicate with you, and then keep in contact regularly with your attorney.

You probably wouldn't be meeting with the lawyer in the first place if you weren't ready to hire somebody. While you may still change your mind at almost any point, be prepared to proceed forward by bringing a checkbook and/or a credit card to pay a retainer to the lawyer if he or she asks before moving forward. Keep in mind that lawyers cost a lot of money and you will be expected to pay for their services. From the lawyer's perspective, a client who is unwilling to pay a retainer up front for good legal advice may not be willing to pay for it down the road.

As you visit with each lawyer, trust your judgment. Ask yourself, do I like this person? Does he or she seem willing to take the time to listen to what's going on in my life and what I want to accomplish? To explain the options available to me?

Unless you're facing a filing deadline, you'll rarely need to rush into the decision of which lawyer to use. Better to learn all you can about several lawyers and then make the decision at your own pace. Feel free to discuss what you've learned with a trusted friend or relative before making the decision, and in particular before depositing a large retainer.

Feel free to visit with several lawyers before making a decision. If the lawyer seems offended that you would do this, he or she may not be confident enough to serve you well. Note: you should not be offended if a lawyer asks you to pay a consultation fee even for the first meeting. Once the lawyer meets with you, he or she usually cannot represent your spouse, and that may be a substantial cost to the lawyer's practice.

SOURCE: Lawyers.com

Family Law: Preparing to Meet with a Lawyer

It can be a big waste of time for both you and the lawyer if you are not prepared for your first meeting. Being unprepared may also end up costing you money because it will take longer for the lawyer you hire to get up to speed on your legal matter.

First of all, the lawyer will want to know who you are and how you can be contacted. The lawyer may also ask for a personal and business background. He or she will clearly want to understand your situation. Thus, you need to write down anything that you consider be relevant background information and have it available for the lawyer. Also bring along any documents that you have.

Sometimes, a lawyer may also try to facilitate the information gathering process by sending you a questionnaire to fill out filled out in advance. If this happens, be sure to fill out the questionnaire and send it in to the lawyer's office before the meeting. Also send along copies of any available documents that may be requested in the questionnaire.

Before you get too far into a meeting or conversation, the lawyer is going to want to know about possible conflicts of interest. If the lawyer or the lawyer's firm represents anyone on the other side of the fence, he or she will have a conflict and will usually not be able to represent you.

Family Law: Selecting a Good Lawyer

Choosing the right lawyer to help you in your divorce is hard work. But it's important and worth taking the time to do it right.

First, ask yourself what it is you're trying to accomplish. Do you just need an uncontested divorce? Is mediation a possibility? Or has your relationship with your spouse deteriorated to the point that what you really need is simply a warrior to go forth and do bloody (and frightfully expensive) battle on your behalf in an adversarial divorce?

Are your affairs fairly simple, so that most any lawyer with basic understanding and good people skills can help you, or do you have complex property holdings and support goals, so that you need a lawyer with sophisticated tax and financial awareness to help you design a plan that yields the most after-tax dollars? Knowing the kind of legal services you're going to need will help you shop for those services more effectively.

Standards for Civility for Family Lawyers

The American Bar Association’s Section of Family Law has adopted Civility Standards. The Standards address the responsibility of the family lawyer to be civil to clients, opposing counsel, and the Court.

I. To Client

1. Treat the client with respect.
2. Try to keep the client on an even emotional keel and avoid characterizing the actions of the other party, opposing lawyers, and judicial officials in emotional terms.
3. Be aware of counseling resources and be prepared to refer the client to counseling where appropriate.
4. Where a client has an exaggerated or unrealistic view of his or her options in any given situation, explain matters as carefully as possible in order to assist the client to realistically assess the situation.
5. Respond promptly to client requests for advice or information.
6. Consider the availability and appropriateness of forms of alternate dispute resolution.
7. Where a client wishes to pursue a claim or motion for purely hostile or vindictive purposes, explain to the client the reasons why the client should not do so.
8. Do not assist a client in pursuing a claim for primary custody or visitation where the purpose of the claim is to obtain bargaining leverage in order to achieve a purely economic objective.
9. Avoid any communication to client about the judge, the other lawyer, or the other party that will contribute to disrespect for the legal process.
10. Encourage clients to comply with all court orders.

II. To Opposing Counsel

1. Be honest in all communications with opposing counsel. Do not intentionally misrepresent any factual or legal argument.
2. Be respectful and courteous in all oral and written communications with the opposing side.
3. Do not engage in conduct, oral or written, that promotes animosity and rancor between the parties or their counsel.
4. Use a demeanor and conduct during a deposition or other out-of-court meeting that would be no less appropriate than it would be in the courtroom.
5. Do not engage in harassing or obstructive behavior.
6. Honor reasonable requests for routine extensions of time, unless a client’s position will be adversely and materially affected.
7. Confer in good faith with opposing counsel on scheduling matters.
8. Do not utilize the manner of service of pleadings or discovery requests to disadvantage the opposing counsel.

III. To the Court

1. Act with complete honesty; show respect for the court by proper demeanor; and act and speak civilly to the judge, court staff and adversaries.
2. Avoid frivolous litigation and non-essential pleading in litigation.
3. Explore settlement possibilities at the earliest reasonable date, and seek agreement on procedural and discovery matters.
4. Avoid delays not dictated by a competent and justified presentation of a client’s claims or defenses.
5. Strive to protect the dignity and independence of the judiciary, particularly from unjust criticism and attack.

Thanks to David C. Sarnacki for his post at the Domestic Diversions blog on this subject and to Ben Stevens at the South Carolina Family Law Blog for his post of the same.

Fighting Fire with Fire

The following post is by Maryland attorney, James Gross, author of the Maryland Divorce Legal Crier Blog:

A friend of mine was going through a divorce. Her husband hired a very aggressive attorney. Alright, let’s not mince words. He hired a shark.

My friend, against my advice, decided to fight fire with fire. She thought she needed an equally aggressive attorney to protect her from her husband’s attorney. So she hired a barracuda.

The attorneys argued with each other, wrote lots of scathing letters, gathered documents, conducted mean spirited conferences and telephone conferences.

After six months, legal bills amounted to thirty thousand dollars on each side. The parties had made no progress they were still at an impasse.

My friend was running out of money. In desperation, she called her husband and said, “This is getting us nowhere. Let’s get rid of our attorneys and settle our case ourselves.”

And that is what they did.

She learned the hard way. Fighting fire with fire only leads to conflagration. It makes more sense to fight fire with water.

The Best Lawyers are Nice People

Dan Nunley at the Oklahoma Family Law Blog posted this great article on factors clients shoudl use in selecting their attorney:

Many people have no idea as to what they should reasonably expect from the divorce lawyer they have hired to represent them. In this post, I will discuss some attorney behaviors in an effort to help you find a good attorney and/or alert you to legitimate concerns about your existing attorney.

In my practice I have worked with many attorneys. Some were the cream of the crop while others were the dregs. Based on my personal experience, I believe that the very best attorneys are also nice people.

The very best attorneys can assertively represent their client's best interests without being rude and hostile to opposing counsel, witnesses or the court. These attorneys do not feel the need to convince you that they know everything. They are not show-offs. They are not primadonnas. They are not arrogant blow-hards. They also understand that "louder" does not mean "smarter"!

The best attorneys do not feel like they have to prove anything to anybody. They know they are good, and so does everyone else. Whereas many times, less-skilled attorneys feel they must compensate for their lack of skills, knowledge and expertise by being mean, pompous and uncooperative.

How to Hire a Lawyer for Your Family Court Case

Choosing the right attorney can be crucial to the outcome of your case. There are certain things you should know in order to help you with the sometimes difficult process of choosing the right attorney. Not only will this save you time (and maybe money) when meeting with your attorney for the first time, but it will also help you to become more knowledgeable about the issues you may want to consider during the critical process of hiring an attorney.

It is always a good idea to meet face to face with an attorney to get a feel for how comfortable you feel working with him. Because of the types of personal issues that arise, it is particularly important that you feel very comfortable with who represents you in Family Court. You should also be prepared for the possibility of rejection. The attorney-client relationship is a two way street, and the better attorneys do not accept every case that comes into their offices.

Before meeting with an attorneys, you should try to make notes pertaining to your case and also to bring all of the related documents with you to your first meeting. These documents may include Orders from previous cases, pleadings in your present case, witness statements, or reports from medical providers, private investigators, or law enforcement. Being able to present the facts of your case in a clear and organized fashion will greatly assist us in analyzing your situation and will result in you receiving better, more specific advice.

How to Hire a Lawyer for Your Family Court Case (Part 3 of 3)

Once you have met with the attorney, explained your case and had your questions answered, there are some questions you should ask yourself:

• Will I feel comfortable working closely with this person?
• Do I feel confident in the lawyer’s experience and skill to handle my case?
• Do I understand the lawyer’s explanation of what my case involves?
• Do I understand the proposed fee agreement?

If you feel comfortable with the attorney and confident that his experience is adequate for your case, you have probably found a good match. Asking and answering the above questions will go a long way in determining if this is the right attorney for you.

SOURCE: South Carolina Family Law Blog

How to Hire a Lawyer for Your Family Court Case (Part 2 of 3)

Once you explain the facts and background for your case along with any relevant information, it will be your turn to ask questions of the lawyer to determine if he is the right one for you. Some of the questions you might consider asking the attorney are:

• How long has the lawyer been in practice?
• How much experience does the lawyer have in your type of case?
• How does the lawyer believe the case should be handled?
• What is the lawyer’s anticipated time frame for its completion?
• How will you be expected to participate in your case?
• How will you be kept informed about the status of your case?
• Will the lawyer provide a fee agreement that details fees, expenses, billing, and payment?

SOURCE: South Carolina Family Law Blog

How to Hire a Lawyer for Your Family Court Case (Part 1 of 3)

Choosing the right attorney can be crucial to the outcome of your case. There are certain things you should know in order to help you with the sometimes difficult process of choosing the right attorney. Not only will this save you time (and maybe money) when meeting with your attorney for the first time, but it will also help you to become more knowledgeable about the issues you may want to consider during the critical process of hiring an attorney.

It is always a good idea to meet face to face with an attorney to get a feel for how comfortable you feel working with him. Because of the types of personal issues that arise, it is particularly important that you feel very comfortable with who represents you in Family Court. You should also be prepared for the possibility of rejection. The attorney-client relationship is a two way street, and the better attorneys do not accept every case that comes into their offices.

Before meeting with an attorneys, you should try to make notes pertaining to your case and also to bring all of the related documents with you to your first meeting. These documents may include Orders from previous cases, pleadings in your present case, witness statements, or reports from medical providers, private investigators, or law enforcement. Being able to present the facts of your case in a clear and organized fashion will greatly assist us in analyzing your situation and will result in you receiving better, more specific advice.

SOURCE: South Carolina Family Law Blog

How To Choose A Lawyer

Identifying a Legal Problem

A good way to determine whether you have a legal problem or need legal assistance is to ask a lawyer. Most lawyers will initially discuss and determine whether you have a legal problem without charging a fee.

Choosing a Lawyer

Once you decide to call a lawyer, the next decision is which one. In order to determine this, the following is a list of suggestions that might help you decide who to call.

• Ask friends, teachers, employer, co-workers, minister, relatives, neighbors or anyone you trust which lawyer(s) they have used and if they did a good job.
• Many online resources are available for selecting a lawyer in your geographic area and in the area of expertise you need.
• The State Bar of Georgia does not refer individual lawyers but some local bars do offer a referral service. Check the telephone directory in your area to see if there is one.
• Go to your local public library and ask for the Martindale-Hubbell Law Directory. It lists most lawyers and their area of practice within your community, the state of Georgia and the United States.
• Ask other lawyers.
• Call your local legal aid or public defender's office to see if you qualify for representation.

Fees/Costs and Initial Consultation

Once you have decided which lawyer to call, you should ask the lawyer whether he/she charges a fee for the initial consultation (first visit), and if so, how much. If you decide after the first meeting that you want to hire a lawyer, you should ask for an estimated cost for services. Most lawyers will enter into a written agreement listing the fees, costs, and the nature and extent of the lawyer's representation. You should understand from the first meeting how much the lawyer will charge to handle your case. Costs are different from fees. The client is ultimately responsible for court costs, filing fees, etc.

The first time you meet with a lawyer, you should be prepared to discuss and ask questions in regards to the facts and any legal problems pertaining to these facts. Do not be shy or intimidated by the lawyer or his/her offices. The questions below are ideas for a potential client to ask the lawyer, followed by suggested direction for the client and lawyer.

Based on my situation, do I have a legal problem?

Client:
Make sure you fully explain your situation to your lawyer. Bring any papers or documents you think may help explain the story to the first meeting. Make sure your lawyer covers both practical solutions to the problems as well as all of your options available under the law. Do not try to convince the lawyer of the merits of your position by exaggerating the facts. If you know, make sure you tell the lawyer the position taken by the potential adverse party.

Lawyer:
The lawyer should have sufficient discussion with the client to determine that the facts indicate a legal problem. The lawyer should attempt to identify, as best he/she can, all the legal problems represented by the discussion of facts with the client.

Are you the lawyer who can help me? Is this something you routinely handle? If not, can you refer me to someone who does?

Client:
It is important to discuss with the lawyer how much experience he/she has in dealing with cases similar to yours. If the lawyer doubts his or her competence to handle the matter then be sure to ask for a referral to other lawyers who are familiar with cases such as yours. Also ask about the outcome of the other cases that the lawyer has handled, as well as whether or not the anticipated fees and costs that you have been quoted by the lawyer is in line with the fees and costs charged in the other cases.

Lawyer:
The lawyer should be careful to handle only matters he/she is competent to handle. If the lawyer is in doubt, he/she should refer the matter to a lawyer who concentrates in the area at issue and possibly associate himself/herself with that lawyer as an assistant to handle issues with which he/she is competent to deal with.

How much will this cost me?

Client:
Make sure the lawyer fully identifies and explains the legal problems you currently face. The lawyer should give you some idea of the amount of money required in legal fees as well as expenses for the action that he/she is going to take for you. Whether the client is charged on an hourly basis or a contingent fee basis, the reason for the fee should be fully explained to you. Before actually agreeing for the lawyer to represent you, feel free to get an explanation of the fee in writing from the lawyer and signed by both of you. See the definitions below for fees.

• Retainer Fee. Advance payment to the lawyer for a portion of his or her fee.
• Fee. An agreed-upon percentage of any monies obtained through settlement, trial or negotiation.
• Hourly Fee. The lawyer's hourly rate multiplied by the number of hours (or portion of hours) spent on your case.
• Fixed Fee. A specific amount of money for a specific service.
• Cost Advance. Periodic advance payment to the lawyer for on-going expenses associated with litigation.
• Mixed Fee. Combination of contingency and hourly fees.

Lawyer:
Having focused on the number and nature of legal problems, the lawyer should explain the complexity of the problems to the client with the idea of setting forth the degree of legal expense that the client might expect. Lawyer should be forthright and communicate directly and clearly with the client regarding anticipated legal expense. Whether the client is charged on an hourly basis or a contingent fee basis, the reason should be fully explained to the client. If a retainer fee is needed up front, the client should be informed as to the reason. Within parameters, a total fee might be projected to the client so as to avoid misunderstandings later. A written agreement is recommended.

How long will it take to solve my legal problem?

Client:
Again, ask the lawyer how long it has taken him/her to bring cases similar to yours to a conclusion in the past. Ask if your case involves issues more complex than his/her previous cases and whether or not that will affect the expected time to bring this case to a conclusion. Ask if there are any legal time limitations which restrict the length of time you have to bring an action. Ask what he/she believes to be the best case as opposed to worst case scenario with regard to the amount of time that he/she expects the case will take. If there is no way to predict how long this matter might take, what are the reasons for that? If there is anything you can do to speed up the process?

Lawyer:
The lawyer should assess the legal issues involved and surrounding facts presented by the client. Based upon the lawyer's expertise and experience, he/she should have an idea as to how long it will take to resolve the problems presented. Within certain parameters, if best case as opposed to worst case, the lawyer should give the client full expectations as to how long it will take to bring the matter to a conclusion.

What results can I expect? What do you expect to accomplish?

Client:
Ask the lawyer whether or not the facts you presented in that first meeting give him/her enough information to make a prediction with regard to the results of the case. Ask him/her to explain the law as it relates to your case and the effect which existing laws may have on your case. It is extremely important that both the client and lawyer fully understand each other with regard to the results expected. This should play a big part in determining whether or not the cost and the time involved in pursuing the matter are worth what is expected as a result.

Lawyer:
From hearing the facts presented by the client, as well as other needed inquiry, the lawyer should have an idea about the strengths and weaknesses of the client's position. Based upon the client's expectations and goals, the lawyer should advise the client as to the legal likelihood of accomplishing these goals and expectations. For example, if the lawyer actually expects to have a full-blown jury trial on a matter, he/she should avoid leading the client to believe that they will settle the matter with a mere phone call. The lawyer should explain that some cases are not cost-effective if they are being undertaken as "a matter of principal."

The Expectation of the Client and the Lawyer

The lawyer and client should agree on what expectations that each have and how the lawyer will try to obtain those expectations like settlement, mediation or trial. The client has a right to expect a status report of the case and know how frequently the lawyer will provide one.

SOURCE: State Bar of Georgia

When You Can Keep Lawyers Out of Divorce -- And When You Need One

When getting divorced without a lawyer makes sense -- and when you should hire one.

You probably know of people who suffered the torments of hell going through divorce, and you also probably know people who pulled it off without much fuss. Why are some divorces sensible and others catastrophic?

The answer can depend, to a surprising extent, on just one factor: how much you rely on lawyers and courts to resolve troublesome issues. The less you use the court, the less cost and heartache, and, in many cases, the better quality of the final result. But how do you avoid courts and lawyers?

Make Decisions by Yourselves

In theory, at least, it's simple: You do best if you and your spouse work out thorny issues together, with help from a neutral third person, such as a mediator, if you need it. You don't let lawyers haggle over such vital matters as how your children will be raised, what happens to the family home, and how your property will be divided. If you and your spouse can work these issues out yourselves -- and many, if not most, couples can -- you will save yourselves time, money, and anguish. More important, you will spare your children the ugly spectacle of extended parental fights, helping them come through the divorce as undamaged as possible.

If you are able to resolve the big questions of children, money, and property, you then just need to ask the court, in writing, to grant a divorce. In many states, you don't even have to appear in court. Many courts now make it relatively easy for people to handle an uncontested divorce without a lawyer.

Keep Lawyers From Fanning the Flames

When you're emotionally distraught or angry, turning all the details and hassle of a divorce over to a lawyer may seem like a perfect solution. Unfortunately, it can turn out to be a deal with the devil. Most observers -- and people who have been through an acrimonious divorce -- agree that lawyers frequently make things worse, not better.

This happens because lawyers operate under a prime directive: the zealous pursuit of their client's interests. One lawyer can't fully represent both divorcing spouses, because each spouse's best interests are different. So, when one spouse brings a lawyer into a divorce, the other usually does likewise. There may even be a third lawyer to represent the children if there is a custody dispute. And then it can get ugly. When two or more lawyers are fighting for their clients' interests, the battle can go on and on, intensifying in passion, until the clients run out of money and limp to the settlement table.

Worse, if there are children, the fight depletes not only your pocketbook but also your children's sense of security and self-esteem. Once the legal fight is over, trying to establish a normal ongoing parenting relationship between both parents and the children can be very difficult.

How to Keep Lawyers Civil

If you and your spouse do hire lawyers, you can stop your lawyer from engaging in lengthy, expensive arguments with your spouse's attorney. Explain that you believe a combative approach does not suit your or your children's needs. Most lawyers would rather have a satisfied client than feed their ego by fighting the other side's attorney.

How Collaborative Law Works

Some family lawyers are trying a new method called "collaborative law," in which the clients and lawyers agree that they will not go to court but will share information voluntarily and work cooperatively toward a settlement. Collaborative lawyers will take cases only where the other spouse has also hired a collaborative lawyer, and the lawyers sign an agreement that, if the case can't be settled, the parties have to hire another lawyer to do the litigation. This removes the lawyers' financial incentive to go to court and encourages everyone to settle earlier.

When to Hire a Lawyer

It makes a lot of sense to hire a lawyer if there is a real problem with abuse -- spousal, child, sexual, or substance. In that situation, a lawyer can help you get the arrangement you need to protect yourself and your children.

It can also make sense to hire a lawyer if your spouse is being dishonest or vindictive and you just can't cope with it. In that case, you may need someone to protect your interests.

It's also prudent to hire a lawyer if your spouse has an attorney. This is especially true if you have children or are facing complicated financial issues. It could be difficult and emotionally intimidating to go head to head with a seasoned pro.

If you can't afford a lawyer, consider calling your local legal aid office. If you qualify financially, a lawyer will at a minimum discuss the legal aspects of your case with you and may continue to answer questions on an ongoing basis during your proceedings while you represent yourself. Ask whether the legal aid office has a pro bono program. The office may have a list of private attorneys that are willing to take on cases referred by legal aid, at little or no cost.

If you don't qualify for legal services or pro bono help, you'll have to shop around for someone to represent you.

If You Fear Violence

If you fear that your spouse might harm you or your children or abscond with your property, take action immediately. Move to a safe place, and, if necessary, get a temporary restraining order to keep the spouse away. It's very important that you also get a temporary order for custody of your children, so that you're not accused of kidnapping. If you need money, you have the right to use your joint accounts. Take the amount of money you realistically need plus some extra for emergencies (but try not to take more than half of what's there unless you absolutely have to), and immediately file an action in court for support.

How Divorce Mediation Can Help

Mediators help you and your spouse get over the emotional barriers to negotiation and fashion a sensible divorce agreement that meets the both of your needs. Unlike lawyers, mediators work with both spouses at the same time. They don't represent the individual spouses' interests, the way a lawyer does. Instead, mediators facilitate a negotiation between the spouses that in most cases results in an agreement satisfactory to both sides.

SOURCE: Nolo

Do You Need an Attorney for Your Family Court Case?

Parties involved in Family Court cases face some of the toughest issues that people must deal with in their lives. Divorce and separation cases involve the loss of a partnership and the end of a relationship that was once close and filled with love. Custody and visitation cases affect the amount of time that a parent spends with the most precious thing in his or her life. Other cases involve financial issues which can determine whether a party has enough money on which to survive in the short and/or long term.

When faced with these important issues, most people want to seek the advice and assistance of an experienced, competent attorney. Ideally, you want to find an attorney who is not only trained in and very knowledgeable of the law, but who also has experience in preparing documents, courtroom procedure, settlement negotiation, and other aspects of Family Court cases. Hiring an attorney will help things to run more smoothly in your case and will increase the likelihood of your receiving a favorable result in your case.                   

Although it is possible to represent yourself in Family Court, it is not advisable in the vast majority of cases. Should you choose to represent yourself, the Court will not be able to assist you with your case in any manner. You will be held to the same requirements of the other party’s attorney with regard to the law, procedure, and all other issues. Should you mishandle your own case due to lack of knowledge or lack of skill, it is unlikely that an attorney will later be able to undo your mistakes.

Typically during your first meeting with an attorney, he/she will be able to assess your case and advise you of your rights and options in light of the specific facts of your case. Considering the types of issues addressed in Family Court cases, you must be comfortable sharing with your attorney information that may be personal or otherwise confidential. Certainly, doing so may be uncomfortable for you, but these types of details can make a big difference in your case. Your lawyer must be aware of everything that might pertain to your case, so it is important that you be comfortable in sharing these details with another person.

Though many people may balk at the cost of hiring an attorney, the fees charged are usually worth the experience and professionalism that an attorney can bring to the courtroom. There are certain areas of the law in which an experienced, aggressive attorney is highly recommended in order for you to have a fair trial or to negotiate the settlement that you deserve. If you had to ask yourself whether you need an attorney -- you probably do and you'll be glad later that you did.

Source: "Do You Need an Attorney for Your Family Court Case? at the South Carolina Family Law Blog.

Remarks Made by Opposing Parties in Family Court

Ben Stevens at the South Carolina Family Law blog posted the following about frequently heard comments from his client's spouses. I share Ben's philosophy about such comments and wanted topass them on in this post:

"I Family Court cases, it is not uncommon for people to make remarks to intimidate, upset, and/or cause stress for each other. Because of the close relationships the parties previously had with each other, they usually know just which remarks to make to cause the maximum response on the intended victim.

Since these types of comments unfortunately are made all too often, our firm strives to make our clients and potential clients aware of them to help minimize their impact. We urge our clients to refrain from making these types of remarks, as they only create more stress for them, more work for us, and more expense in their cases.

These typical remarks can include some or all of the following:

• “I am going to drag this case out forever. By the time you get your share of the property, you'll be too old to enjoy it.”
• “If you persist in your financial demands, I am going to file a custody action and take the children away from you.”
• “I’ve got the best lawyer in town. He’s going to crush you and your lawyer.”
• “My lawyer is mean. He’s going to make your life miserable.”
• “Your lawyer is a crook. His only interest is to drag out the case in order to make more money.”
• “You've gotten yourself the most expensive lawyer around. The two lawyers are going to eat up all of the assets that we acquired during the marriage.”
• “My lawyer knows all of the judges. There’s no way that you are going to get a decent result in Court.”
• “I was ready to give you a fair settlement. Now that you got a lawyer, I am going to play hard ball and you're going to end up with much less than I was willing to give you.”
• “I’m going to take the children and you will never see them again.”
• “You’re crazy for pushing this divorce case. All that you are doing is taking money away from the children.”
• “If you don’t settle on a reasonable basis, I will have to take the children out of school.”
• “I’m going to tell the children that you are responsible for this mess.”
• “At the rate you and your lawyer are going, I’ll have to declare bankruptcy and nobody is going to win.”
• “If you don't settle on my terms, I’m going to drag your girlfriend (or boyfriend) into this case.”
• “Your lawyer is too busy to handle this case.”
• “You can’t trust lawyers. They always work with the lawyer on the other side and run up unnecessary time to make more money.”

Hopefully, the opposing party in your case isn’t the type who makes such outrageous statements. On the other hand, you could be on the receiving end of such remarks or of variations on these themes. Fortunately, there is rarely is any basis for such comments, and they are usually made to provoke a desired response.

We want to assure our clients and potential clients that with regard to these types of comments, our firm’s position is the following:

1. Our attorneys and office staff are experienced in Family Court cases, and you can be assured that we are not going to be intimidated by any such statements made by the opposing party in your case.
2. If you have any concerns about any statements the opposing party makes, please discuss them with us.
3. We work for you. Our job is to work on your behalf and to take reasonable and necessary steps to help you obtain your desired results in your case.
4. Finally, we take pride in our adherence to the strictest of ethical standards. You can always count on our integrity and good faith in representing you."

SOURCE: South Carolina Family Law blog

Ten Things To Look For In A Family Lawyer

I have been listed on DivorceNet.com for several years now (as is evident by that old photograph of me; [note to self, get that updated!]) and I wanted to share some of the great information assembled there. This is a checklist of important factors in choosing an attorney to handle your divorce, custody, legitimation or other domestic relations cases, written by the lawyers at Rockhill Pinnick, LLP :

"I have found that when most people are looking for a lawyer to handle their divorce, custody modification, or other related family law issues, they often ask whether the other attorney is tough, a fighter, or will tell me that they heard that their wife's attorney is a shark (or worse). 

Everyone wants a family law attorney who can handle the stress and strain of the courtroom appearance, and any lawyer can claim that he is tough, just like any politician can claim that he or she will represent you. Being tough almost goes without saying, and it is too easy to say.

Persons looking for a family law attorney should instead be aware of the following qualities. These are all things that a client can assess on his or her own relatively quickly, and should discover before it is too late.

I. Stays Calm.

Your attorney has to be able to stay calm and patient. Both sides in a divorce are usually far from calm, and the children, grandparents, and other people having to suffer the fallout from a divorce will be panicky as well. Your family lawyer should be able to deal with you in a calm, controlled manner. He should show patience with you and with the other side. Panicking rarely, if ever, solves a problem. 

II. Is Willing to Say No…. Even to You.

A good attorney is candid about your chances in obtaining an outcome on a particular issue. That attorney should also tell you if you are doing something wrong, or if you are wasting your time. Simply because a client wants something does not mean that it is the best thing for a client, or that it is the right thing to do. 

While some clients get upset when they find out that their attorney will not do everything that they are told, this is just the type of attorney that you should be seeking. Otherwise, your attorney will quickly get a reputation of asking for frivolous things or taking positions on issues that he knows the court will not adopt. That makes it tougher for that attorney to be successful on truly close issues. Also, you are paying good money for that attorney, and you deserve the best advice, not just what you want to hear.

III. Uses Technology.

Property division, pension allocation, child support issues, and many other matters relating to divorce and custody rely on software programs to make efficient, intelligent decisions. If your attorney is not up-to-date on these issues, and is still using pencil and paper to formulate a property division, he is behind the times. He should also be able to communicate with you by email, and discuss the opportunities and advantages of electronic communication when parents and children are living apart. If your attorney has not kept up-to-date on technical issues, it is unlikely that he has kept up-to-date on legal issues either.

IV. Knows the Playing Field.

Your attorney will not be able to predict the future. He will not always know how a particular issue will be decided. He should have enough experience with the judge, with the law, and with the other lawyer to intelligently analyze the probabilities.

If you are asking your attorney to travel to another county or jurisdiction, he should discuss with you what he knows, and doesn’t know, about the judges and lawyers in that area.

V. Puts Your Children First.

The client’s children need to be the number one priority for both the client and the attorney. No one should abuse, misuse, or manipulate the children in a divorce case. It is really that simple.

VI. Keeps His Eyes on Important Issues.

I once had an opposing attorney send me a letter vilifying my client, and demanding that I take action to make sure that my client (who was living in the marital home and had the family’s personal computer) immediately EMAIL her client’s resume to her. Given the fact that the woman was less than 25 years of age, I would have thought that she could probably remember where she went to high school, and what jobs she had held. This attorney was simply not willing to tell her client that this was not an important issue in the greater scheme of things, and that she should probably save her money for more important issues. Likewise, a client once asked me to file a contempt action after a final hearing in a divorce action. When the personal property was divided by the court, the client was to get a 60-foot garden hose from the side of the garage; he was certain that the garden hose’s disappearance was an intentional act to irritate him. I explained to him that it would have to be one heck of a garden hose to justify filing a contempt action, and again suggested that he spend his money in a more important area. An attorney who gets distracted in court by pursuing arguments about whether a bicycle should be in the mother’s home or the father’s home will not be as effective in front of most trial judges in dealing with the more important issue of where the child should be. 

VII. Is Open to Questions.

Your attorney should answer your questions. If he cannot, he should tell you why not. If you do not think that you are getting a fair answer to your question, then write him a letter or send an email. Frequently attorneys think that they have answered questions, but the client is still confused. Do yourself a favor and the attorney a favor and be sure to ask again. If you cannot receive an answer after that, then that attorney may not be for you. (Caveat: remember, your attorney cannot predict the future. If he could, he would be betting on football games in Las Vegas, not meeting with you at 4:30 p.m. on a Friday afternoon when the sun is shining, the fish are biting, and the beer is cold).

VIII. Makes a Good Presentation to You.

Remember, as a potential client, you are a potential boss. If an attorney does not behave, dress, and talk in a manner that provides good presentation to you, what makes you think he will do any better to a judge?

IX. Is Trustworthy.

In the popular media, sometimes people think the best lawyer is the one who is the sneakiest, or plays the closest to the edge of ethical, moral, or legal behavior. Resist the temptation to hire an attorney who acts like that. Judges will not let attorneys get away with that behavior for very long; opposing counsel will be much more difficult to work with (meaning you will be spending a lot more money); and ultimately you will have a more contentious divorce, with nothing to be gained to compensate you for the increased bitterness and expense.

X. Solves Problems.

If the attorney you are interviewing for hire simply talks in terms of winning and losing, get up and leave. By definition, every person going through a divorce suffers some loss, and certainly children are losers no matter what the outcome. What you want is an attorney who works to identify the problems and solve the problems. Solutions to these problems may come by counseling, a word of wise advice to you, patience, mediation, or possible trial in front of a judge. No options should be foreclosed. Five years after the divorce, you will not be able to remember who “won” or “lost,” but you will remember whether the divorce was too expensive, whether your financial settlement or division was extremely unbalanced, and how your children either suffered or survived after resolution of your case. An attorney who does not work to solve problems before going to court will not be a good family law attorney. "

SOURCE: DivorceNet.com